asimplechord

Good afternoon, all!
*waves*
Next snapshot is posted.
It's this way.
Spanking. If it weren't beneath a Malfoy's dignity, there'd be some public!sex too.

Need a chuckle? Go read my Man-Bit Euphemism Challenge Response at fcukficathons. There are a couple others posted as well, including a House/Wilson fic.



Title: A little help from my friends.
Pairings: Ron/Lavender, Harry/surprise
Rating: R

(The rest of the info is posted along with it over at the comm.)

And just as a reminder, it is meant to be crack!fic, which in my mind skirts the edge of ludicrous and possibly squicky topics that I'd never write, normally.

I've edited and re-posted a fic I wrote a while back. Originally it was meant to come after Blue, a drabble I wrote for snarkyroxy's Pregnant Potions challenge. But I didn't really care for it in that context, so I rearranged a bit of it.

Rating: PG13
Pairing: SS/RL implied
Warnings/Genre: angst, canon-compliant, internal monologue
Word count: ~2700

Read the Potions master's end-of-year thoughts.

Title: The professors' opinions
Rating: G
Warnings: none, except for the fact that is really not HBP-compliant
Disclaimer: It's all JKR's. I enjoy playing in her universe, though.

The previous snapshots are here.

( Snape's opinion and McG's point of view )

Snapshot Title: Christmas morning
Warnings: sex (finally), still a bit of fluff
Rating: hard R/NC17
Disclaimer: Nope, still not mine. But I've finally gotten around to the bits that JKR'd probably think are obscene. :)
A/N: You know me, I always just type away and post immediately - usually my ponderings happen initially on paper in outline form. Mostly. Except the smut, which occurs purely in my imagination. So any grammar or punctuation mistakes are all my own fault, and I should be flogged. Or something. :D


Previous bits of the arc are here.

( What did Harry get for Christmas? )

Snapshot Title: Draco's regrets
Pairing: H/D
Rating: PG13 (?)
Warning: Fluff, sexual activity, some morose self-flagellation
Disclaimer: JKR owns these characters. I just like to imagine them in all sorts of lascivious situations.
A/N: As usual, written during lunchbreak and unbeta'd. Tell me what you think before I post it to an archive.

Previous installment can be found here, the whole arc is here.

( Draco's regrets )

Title: none yet, I'm open to suggestion
Warning: reference to mpreg
Genre: Gen
Disclaimer: If it looks like a character created by JKR, that's because it IS.
Summary: Snape's year-in-review thoughts from Year 3 through Year 7 of Harry's schooling. Companion piece to Blue, which was both a response to snarkyroxy's challenge and my twisted idea about why Snape might have used Wolfsbane as an excuse to go to Lupin's office that night in PoA. Unbeta'd, except for why_me_why_not's comments on the first section.

( Read more... )

Snapshot Title: Hermione's and Molly's perspectives
Warnings: more fluff, armchair psychoanalysis, not HBP-compliant
Rating: still PG, and probably will be for a bit
Disclaimer: I only wish these characters were mine. But since the things I'd do to them would be obscene, perhaps it's for the best that they belong to JKR, Scholastic, etc.
A/N: Written during my lunchbreak today and entirely unbeta'd. Feel free to ping me with errors.

Previous snapshot is here.

( Snapshot 2 )

Title: The Morning After
Pairing: HP/SS, references to HP/SS/HG
Rating: NC17
Genre(s): PWP, oral sex (literally)
Archived: OWL (if there are no objections to content), x-posted to snape_potter and snarry_slash
Warning: Graphic sex between two consenting adult men, discussion of a previous het!sex encounter, a tiny bit of fluff and maybe a cliché or two
Disclaimers: I don't own these men, otherwise the Half-Blood Prince would NOT have scarpered off with the Death Eaters at the end of book 6; he'd be busy seducing Harry. This snapshot was not meant to copy any other work of fanfiction, and any similarity was unintentional.

A/N: Thanks to terri911 for looking this over superquick. Any remaining mistakes are my own, and if you tell me about them, I'll try to correct them.

This picks up immediately after The Splinching of Severus Snape ended. Not much plot advancement, but plenty of smut.

( Read The Morning After )

As always, constructive criticism is greatly appreciated.

So. After much procrastination and hesitation I have finally finished my splinch-swap thingy. It was meant to be longer, but now I've decided, if the response is positive (you know, not 'that was utter shite, what were you thinking' type reviews) that there will probably be a sequel, possibly a series building from the initial splinch-swap experience. Umm, what more do I need to tell you?

Title: The Splinching of Severus Snape
Archive: OWL, x-posted to snape_potter and snarry_slash
Pairing: HP/SS, HP/SS/HG
Disclaimer: I don't own these characters, JKR and Warner Brothers/Scholastic/whatever huge media conglomerates do. But I surely did enjoy putting them into this situation.
Warning: This contains explicit sex between multiple adult partners of both sexes. If you have issues with that or with homosexuality, don't read this. In fact, are you sure you have come to the right LJ?
Random notes: This is post-war, and takes place at the end of a school year – late June. The Order is just keeping an eye on things. Compliant with books 1-5, book 6 is irrelevant. Although this is written in the third person, there are changes in points of view, and a line of stars usually marks them.
Thanks: Many thanks to why_me_why_not and ordinary_magic for editorial comments. Chocolate Snapes, Harrys and Dracos to bar_bar_ella, lisamarie0921, janicechess, and terri911 for helpful discussion and encouragement. Any remaining mistakes are purely my own.
snarkyroxy, there's something in here just for you - you know which bit it is. :)

( Read the splinch-smut )

Constructive criticism is greatly appreciated.